This article originally appeared in this issue of the WSR: 2013-02-06 .
Sex could not have been more disconnected from the concept of creating life.
The message I'd heard loud and clear was that the purpose of sex was for pleasure and bonding, that its potential for creating life was purely tangential, almost to the point of being forgotten about altogether. This mindset laid the foundation of my views on abortion. Because I saw sex as being closed to the possibility to life by default, I thought of pregnancies that weren't planned as akin to being struck by lightning while walking down the street: Something totally unpredictable, undeserved, that happened to people living normal lives.
So said Jennifer Fulwiler, former atheist turned Catholic, in a recent National Catholic Register blog post . Her words struck me like lightning: "I saw sex as being closed to the possibility of life by default, I thought of pregnancies that weren't planned as akin to being struck by lightning while walking down the street."
I had struggled with unanswered questions for decades. After reading her words, three things became very clear to me:
Fulwiler continues her explanation:
Babies had become the enemy because of their tendencies to pop up out of the blue and ruin everything; and just as societies are tempted to dehumanize the fellow human beings who are on the other side of the lines in wartime, so had I, and we as a society, dehumanized the enemy of sex.
To young, malleable minds deprived of education on the truth and meaning of human sexuality, and so bombarded and assaulted by Planned Parenthood, its cohorts, and a society that has bought into its lies, it is easy to see how the unspoken message received by them is that babies are the enemy of sex, and sexual pleasure is our most basic human right.
She further explains how she arrived at this mindset with her "four key memories that give a glimpse into how my understanding of human sexuality was formed":
When I was a kid, I didn't have any friends who had baby brothers or sisters in their households. To the extent that I ever heard any neighborhood parents talk about pregnancy and babies, it was to say that they were happy that they were "done." Kids seemed like an optional add-on that a couple may or may not choose to add to their marriage, as long as they deemed that caring for offspring wouldn't ruin their ability to have fun together -- which was, as far as I could tell, the main purpose of marriage.
I never remember hearing this kind of talk while I was growing up, but today it is rampant. If a young child or baby entered a room, all the women and young girls clamored for the chance to talk to and hold the little one. I remember working in a law office where many secretaries were dutifully seated in their cubbies typing documents at the speed of light. But when a small child entered the room, the wheels on the office chairs united to make a roller derby commotion, and the charge to the baby ensued. Everyone wanted to hold and love on that child. And those of us who had children mourned every minute that we were not able to be home with them.
It seems that seldom happens today. Mothers with small children are often shunned in public places, and oftentimes people move to get away from them as quickly as possible.
Every time I engage in chitchat in a retail establishment or doctor's office, I am told by someone old enough to be a grandmother that she is glad she is done with children, and/or she has told her children not to have any grandkids for her. She doesn't need them. Planned Parenthood's misinformation campaign that went unchallenged for decades has done untold damage to our society, particularly to women.
Fulwiler continues her explanation, perhaps unwittingly showcasing the methodology and scope of Planned Parenthood inspired sex education:
In sex ed class we learned not that sex creates babies, but that unprotected sex creates babies. After we were done putting condoms on bananas, our teacher counseled us that we should carefully decide when we might be ready to have sex based on important concerns like whether or not we were in committed relationships, whether or not we had access to contraception, how our girlfriends or boyfriends treated us, whether we wanted to wait until marriage, etc. I do not recall hearing readiness to have a baby being part of a single discussion about deciding when to have sex. Not one.
On multiple occasions when I was a young teen, I heard girls my age make the comment that they would readily risk dangerous back-alley abortions or even consider suicide if they were to face unplanned pregnancies and abortion wasn't legal. Though I was not sexually active, it sounded perfectly reasonable to me: That is how much we desired not to have babies before we were ready. Yet the concept of just not having sex if we weren't ready to have babies was never discussed. It's not that we had considered the idea and rejected it; it simply never occurred to us.
It simply never occurred to these young women that sex before marriage was not required. It was a given in their minds, something they were entitled to do when they were "ready," without regard for the children that might be conceived through their actions. This is where Planned Parenthood's "responsible" sex leads - directly to the abortion chamber.
Her last point on how sex became and stayed disconnected from children in her mind is perhaps the most shocking, and certainly an indictment of how the Catholic Church's beautiful teaching on the purpose and meaning of human sexuality has been stifled at the parish level and often the diocesan level, as materials used in marriage preparation are not even derived from Catholic teaching.
Even as recently as 2006, before our marriage was validated in the Catholic Church, my husband and I had to take a course about building good marriages. It was a video series by a nondenominational Christian group, and in the segment called "Good Sex" they did not mention children or babies once. In all the talk about bonding and back rubs and intimacy and the importance of staying in shape, the closest they came to connecting sex to new life was to say quickly that couples should discuss the topic of contraception.
The one entity that has the power to eliminate Planned Parenthood and eliminate the culture of death has been, by and large, sleeping, while Planned Parenthood has gone about its dirty work of converting the culture.
That a Catholic parish or diocese would teach a non-Catholic segment on "good sex" that totally ignores the Church's breathtakingly beautiful teaching on human sexuality and the meaning of marriage makes those in charge of such a program accomplices to Planned Parenthood. Ignoring the education of children in the Church's profound understanding of the purpose and meaning of human sexuality makes those responsible culpable accomplices to Planned Parenthood and the culture of death.
I am reminded of another recent article I read by a radical pro-abortion author, admitting that abortion is the taking of innocent human life. It is disingenuous, she said, to pretend that we do not know that abortion kills a human life. We are sacrificing lives, she said. But they are lives worth sacrificing. Sacrifice for what? She does not say. But it is clearly implied that the lives of our children are worth sacrificing because of a woman's "right" to have sex and not be encumbered by children.
Fulwiler's summary of the formation of her understanding about the meaning and purpose of human sexuality provide startlingly clear answers to the defining questions: How can we possibly have come to the point of sanctioning the brutal killing of preborn children as a woman's right? How can we say that human lives are worth sacrificing because of someone's speculation about what the future may hold?
There is no doubt - and embryology texts have taught for decades - that a person is human from the very beginning of biological development.
Abortion is barbaric. It is the brutal killing of innocent human beings who deserve protection under the law! The culture will not be converted until we stop government-funded, Planned Parenthood-sanctioned "comprehensive, evidence-based" sex education. We must stop it because it distorts the very meaning and purpose of human sexuality, feeding a continuous stream of new adherents into Planned Parenthood's court to be manipulated and brainwashed to believe that babies are the enemy and can be disposed of as garbage.
It is time to step back and realize that we have to begin at the beginning. If we really want to get to the crux of what it will take to win this battle for legal protection for all members of the human family, we have to address man's current attitudes toward sexuality that holds sterility - not fertility - as the goal.