Moncher, Frank J.
75 Articles at


Alternative Aims of Science: How Agendas Harm the Suffering

The actual need of those who seek therapy or counseling, for whatever reason, is to be affirmed in their inherent dignity, to learn to value their unique gifts, to heal their wounds, and to pursue healthy relationships that promote flourishing.

Date posted: 2019-10-09

More Hope for the Trans-confused (and Their Healthcare Providers)

Following on the Texas court ruling in 2016 which challenged the federal regulation that required doctors (even against their conscience or medical objection) to perform gender-transition procedures on children, there is now more encouraging news of efforts to both protect medical practitioners from violating their Hippocratic Oath to "do no harm," and allow them to practice medicine in accord with their deeply-held religious convictions.

Date posted: 2019-08-22

Lost In Trans-lation: The Enormous Problem of Agenda-Driven Research

A law professor in Canada recently published a piece expressing concern regarding the current standard practice of requiring persons to obtain a psychological assessment prior receiving hormone replacement therapy ("HRT") or genital surgery.

Date posted: 2019-05-24

What Is Transgender Child Abuse and Neglect?

The polarization in the medical field regarding what is the proper care and treatment of young people who are struggling with respect to their identity is reaching an epic level.

Date posted: 2019-03-11

Gender Confusion In Our Families: How Does One Respond?

Any ensuing discussions should recognize the totality of the person, apart from any name, pronoun or label. Dignity rests in how the child was made: out of love, unrepeatable, male or female, and in the image and likeness of God.

Date posted: 2018-05-05

Parents' Rights In A Gendered World

"Parents of a 17-year-old girl lost custody of their daughter for opposing her wish for transgender medical treatments" reads the headline.

Date posted: 2018-03-06

The Giving Season: Are We Getting It Right?

Consider the challenge of leaving the traditional mercantile holidays behind, and embracing instead a giving spirit reflective of the gratitude we ought to feel for all we have received. Giving of one's self, Christmas day and every day, is what makes life worth living.

Date posted: 2017-12-24

Boys Will Be Boys ... But Men Should Know Better

What our boys need is clarity and coherence, based on truly time-honored values and virtues.

Date posted: 2017-12-09

Death Is Not Comfortable

Researchers have recently suggested that it would be helpful for those experiencing terminal illness to interface with a computer in order to establish funeral plans, wills and even discuss spiritual matters. An experimental trial is underway to see if this "non-judgmental" service will be of benefit.

Date posted: 2017-10-15

Lost Youth Losing Control: Why Hate?

Compassion toward others is what will heal, but, compassion is generally learned by receiving it during the critical years of formation in the home.

Date posted: 2017-09-30

Child Abuse Masquerading As Compassion: Parental Rights And Wrongs

Many news articles have respectfully (I can only assume this motivation) acceded to the person's butchering of English language pronouns.

Date posted: 2017-09-23

Not Walt's Disney

The traditional family is under attack, most intensely for its views on human sexuality and its proper understanding and purposes: to join man and woman together in an exclusive and sacred bond which produces a unique union of love and the blessing of children. This notion, which was common sense for millennia and second-nature to our grandparents, is fading quickly from the cultural landscape

Date posted: 2017-09-02

Blue Whales and False Mercy

The culture of death not only continues unabated on its tragic path, but is actually growing in its variety of forms, glamor and promotion.

Date posted: 2017-08-16

Parental Advisory Notice on 13RW: Why Not To Watch

Much has been written over the past several weeks about the Netflix mini-series 13 Reasons Why. The series tells the story of a fictional adolescent who committed suicide and left audio tapes to 13 people in her life describing their alleged role in her decision to take her life. I concur with the recommendations that viewing of this series be avoided by all youth (and many adults as well)."

Date posted: 2017-07-09

Worthwhile Vacationing: More People, Less Technology

The best therapeutic advice we have for the proper "care and feeding" of a friendship, a marriage, a family or any other meaningful relationship, is to ensure quality face-to-face time, active listening, and a real presence - sacrificial and giving - for the sake of the other.

Date posted: 2017-05-21

Child Custody Unhinged

A New York State Supreme Court justice recently granted three adults shared custody of a 10-year-old boy. It seems that the biological father and his wife had an ongoing romantic relationship with a female neighbor, who conceived and bore the child; the married couple later divorced, and the two women now live together. When "contemporary forms of the family" crash into the lives of small children, what is a judge to do?

Date posted: 2017-04-01

Gender Ideology and Sexual Diversity: Feelings Trumping Reason

True compassion is shown when the struggles of another are recognized for what they are, and the person's inherent dignity is recognized as well.

Date posted: 2017-03-10

Porn Harms: Law and Science Reflect Natural Truth

True emotional intimacy is the prevention and the remedy which touches the human soul, and provides the genuine experience which pornography so poorly mimics.

Date posted: 2017-02-21

The Need To Belong: Nothing New, But A Crisis Nonetheless

Healthy relationships, characterized by unconditional warmth, affirmation and acceptance of persons in their entirety as they are in truth (not a narrow focus on feelings or attraction), are the pathways to flourishing. They may be difficult to traverse at times, but they are the only paths to joy.

Date posted: 2016-10-15

Back To School Help - Mom, Dad: What's Trans________?

The fundamental point to make is that a person's sexual inclinations or gendered feelings do not determine his or her identity.

Date posted: 2016-09-11

An Update on Transgenderism: Confusion, Yet Glimmers of Hope

The media and many segments of society continue to trumpet the notion that transgenderism is something to be affirmed and supported, rather than treated and healed.

Date posted: 2016-02-05

Living Together Versus Marriage: A Closer Look at the Data

Research has consistently shown the positive impact of marriage on one's mental health. Compared with single persons, married persons tend to report decreased symptoms of depression and increased psychological well-being.

Date posted: 2016-01-18

Partly-Human Chimeras: Fearfully And Wonderfully Made?

Recently, research scientists have been proposing the idea of inserting human stem cells into nonhuman, animal embryos, in hopes of one day growing human organs for transplantation.

Date posted: 2015-12-29

Mental Illness and Violence: Risk Factor? Or One In a Million?

Researchers have suggested that the potential for violence is not any greater among the mentally ill than among the general public, when those with a prior history of psychiatric problems are considered as a group. In fact, there is ample evidence that those suffering mental illness are more likely, as a group, to be victims of violence.

Date posted: 2015-10-18

Wombs For Hire: The Psychological Impact Of Surrogacy

A group of ethicists and professionals has come out strongly against the idea that surrogate motherhood is in any way a sign of progress or advancement for society, noting that the laws of several European countries already expressly prohibit surrogacy.

Date posted: 2015-10-18

Euthanasia's Slippery Slope Going Mental

All of us turn to doctors in our most weak and vulnerable moments, and we trust them first and foremost to do no harm. Yet, a glimpse at statistics coming out of northern Europe reveals that, where it is permitted, euthanasia is growing, accounting for as many as 3-4% of deaths in some countries, a rate 2-3 times higher than only a decade ago.

Date posted: 2015-09-23

Dating And Commitment In The 21st Century

As a culture, we have moved from "Love and Marriage go together like a horse and carriage" to treating the sexual act like a pit stop in a car race.

Date posted: 2015-08-30

Talking About Death: Medical Care Or Breaking An Unspoken Covenant?

The American Hospital Association has estimated that in the 1990s as many as 70% of deaths were "somehow timed or negotiated, with all concerned parties privately concurring on withdrawal of some death-delaying technology".

Date posted: 2015-08-30

Jenner's "Courage" - Three Ways Wrong

Thus, the "courage" Jenner showed is not that of classic virtue theory which demands more than merely being fearless or willing to face perceived threats. True courage, can only be found in choices and actions that result in flourishing and the greater good.

Date posted: 2015-08-11

Adoption: Is Earlier Better?

A phenomenon is emerging where prospective adoptive parents are getting involved in the lives of the birth mother and their hoped-for child earlier and earlier.

Date posted: 2015-07-30

Is There a Psychology To Choosing Child-Free?

The percentage of childless women in the United States aged 40 to 44 doubled from 1976 to 2006, at which point over one-fifth of women had no children.

Date posted: 2015-07-12

Religious Apathy: Should We Care?

While Christianity in America may not be "in collapse" as some have declared, there are reasons we should be concerned about people detaching from their faith lives and shifting to a more secular focus.

Date posted: 2015-06-23

Masculinity Crisis: The Demise Of Guys

Zimbardo reviews the data showing that boys are more likely to drop out of school, are outperformed by girls academically at every level of education, and are failing to establish meaningful relationships with girls.

Date posted: 2015-06-03

"Her" And Her Invisible Boyfriend

"The future of sex includes robots, virtual reality, and drugs to address women's sexual function" says Dr. Laura Berman, touted as a "sex and relationship expert" by the Wall Street Journal (April 26, 2015). Dr. Berman goes on to review a plethora of technological developments that will allow for an ever-wider-ranging span of sexual behavior that will "have endless recreational implications" and the ability to "procreate without meeting in person."

Date posted: 2015-05-31

The No-Debate Gender Debate: Passion Trumps Reason At A Local School Board Meeting

Because I have been reflecting on the issues surrounding transgenderism over the past two years, when my local school board moved to add "gender identity" to its non-discrimination policy I was interested to hear the debate.

Date posted: 2015-05-27

Fostering Self-Worth or Narcissism? What Should Parents Know...

Every parent should know that their child is God's gift to them.

Date posted: 2015-04-28

Suicide Risk And 21st Century Man

The statistical risk of committing suicide among men in their late 40s to late 50s has increased almost 50% in the past decade. While the vast majority of men don't experience such serious despair that they consider harming themselves, the increasing number of them who, in what heretofore had often been considered to be the "prime of their lives," are struggling to find their way, is alarming.

Date posted: 2015-04-07

Are You My Mother?

In the parenting blog of the NY Times, Dawn Bovasso recently featured an article on a new trend: gamete donors are becoming 'open' to being identified to the children they create, and by extension, to the children's custodial parents. But, that's not all. Even in the case of those "traditional" donors who prefer to remain anonymous, change is afoot.

Date posted: 2015-03-11

Divorce, Children And Emotional Incest

A recent piece in First Things highlights what ought to be obvious: children are the most vulnerable party in a divorce.

Date posted: 2015-03-11

The Father Figure: "Symbolically Absent, Missing And Removed"

Understanding the economic pressure on many fathers, Pope Francis emphasized that it is not only families where the father is physically absent that are of concern. He also suggests how the emotional absence of those physically present is problematic: "they don't communicate with their children; they don't fulfill their role as educators; they don't give their children, through their example and their words, the principles, values and life lessons that they need as much as their daily bread."

Date posted: 2015-02-23

Finding a True Self or a Set-up for Regret: Transgenderism Revisited

As experience with Transgenderism - identifying with or expressing a gender identity that differs from the one which corresponds to a person's sex at birth - grows, an amazing polarity seems to be developing.

Date posted: 2015-02-19

Touch Is Healing, And Complicated

Touch is essential to human development. The science of psychology discovered its importance by observing the unfortunate outcomes from the infamous Romanian orphanages under Ceausescu where care was driven by technology and human contact neglected. Some of these infants died, and those who survived and were adopted often suffered great difficulty forming healthy attachments to their adoptive parents and others.

Date posted: 2015-02-02

Reality Dating And Real Courtship - Can One Lead To The Other?

The options for dating in the 21st century are many and complex. One need not look long before encountering an internet or television advertisement for some form of on-line dating, many with a specific demographic focus: religious preference, age cohort (from teens to 50+), occupation (e.g., farmers only), and race.

Date posted: 2015-02-02

American Youth And ISIS: What's The Attraction?

2014 witnessed the rise of a new terror group, a group that has made its name through brutality manifested by graphic, videotaped beheadings of westerners. Ironically, some of its recruits are increasingly coming from the West, and surprisingly, some of these are American youth.

Date posted: 2015-01-11

Early Childhood Education: Who's In Charge?

Traditional values and scientific research both reflect that a child's best chance at flourishing occurs when his or her parents are actively and substantively involved in his or her education.

Date posted: 2014-12-24

Teen Sexting: A Problem, And A Symptom Of A Bigger Problem

This is really the big problem: the lack of true intimacy and emotional connections which bring true joy to life. Sexting is merely a recent and more provocative example of that which has challenged mankind in the past, and will continue to challenge generations which follow: What are you willing to do to be able to look into the eyes of another, with no distractions and simply be with a beloved? Answer this, and you will find hope.

Date posted: 2014-12-24

Ho Ho Ho... So What?

The holidays, for most, are filled with joyous celebrations and fond memories, but for a significant number of our family members and friends, there is, sadly, a struggle to experience good cheer and optimism.

Date posted: 2014-12-11

Fatherhood: Crisis and Opportunity

The dignity of the human person and stability of the traditional family are under attack. A variety of ideologies have emerged which are antagonistic towards traditional Judeo-Christian values, promoting instead competing values, such as materialism, gender neutrality, individualism and consumerism, each of which risks severing close, meaningful relationships among family members.

Date posted: 2014-12-10

Suffering Lives Are Worth Living

This past week, the media observed the lives of two individuals whose commonalities are strikingly obvious: both in their 20s, both dedicating their lives to serving others, and both living with terminal brain cancer - and the unavoidable prognosis of pain, suffering and a limited life expectancy.

Date posted: 2014-12-10

Why Not Purple Penguins?

Earlier this month, reports circulated that a Nebraska school district had instructed its teachers to stop referring to students by "gendered expressions" such as "boys and girls," and use "gender inclusive" terms such as "purple penguins" instead.

Date posted: 2014-10-25

Freshmen Trek to the Dorms: What Are the Risks?

The annual trek of many anxious high school graduates, and their even more anxious parents, has begun as college campus dorms fill with eager young minds pursuing higher education, clarification of career paths, and enduring truth (we hope).

Date posted: 2014-09-23

Experiencing "Transgenderism" on Religious Campuses

On many fronts, the courts are weighing in on the extent to which religious institutions of higher education can follow their faith-based missions. Recent rulings respecting "transgendered" students have granted some exemptions to religious colleges who have set limits on students who choose to live their life as a gender opposite from that in which they were born.

Date posted: 2014-08-15

When Individual Choice Impacts A Community... What Rights Are Right?

What rights are right? Ethical reasoning and common sense would suggest that when it comes to balancing the interior experience of an individual adult, against the potential havoc wreaked among hundreds of teens and their families, the answer is clear.

Date posted: 2014-05-07

"Cohabitation Doesn't Cause Divorce After All": Let's Check The Data And Consider The Children

"Cohabitation doesn't cause divorce after all" reads a recent news headline, though like many headlines on marriage these days it is important to continue reading to gain the full picture of what the research shows.

Date posted: 2014-04-21

The New Status of Pornography - Worthy of Academic Attention?

Sex addiction has resulted in a great deal of pain and loss to those entrapped: from severe marital problems--many of which lead eventually to divorce, to job disruption and loss of career opportunities, to depression and thoughts of suicide.

Date posted: 2014-04-13

Help for Children in Distress: Is Medication the Answer?

Bullied, stressed by pressures of examinations, and otherwise finding it hard to cope with life, a recent article highlighted the plight of thousands of British children. Unfortunately, the Brits are not alone.

Date posted: 2014-03-22

Big time Sports and Sex Trafficking: Modern Day Slavery with Horrific Psychological Consequences

With the bright lights of the Winter Olympics upon us, and the fading lights of the Super Bowl behind us, a recent article suggests that in the shadow of these global sporting events lies an increase in human misery, because "any location that sees an exponential increase in men travelling for entertainment will receive a proportional increase in those who purchase sex."

Date posted: 2014-03-01

Your Doctors and Counselors: Trust, but Verify

There is a longstanding tradition in medicine dating back to the Hippocratic Oath whereby healthcare professionals swear to practice their craft honestly and in the best interest of their patients. In recent years, however, the politics of science and medicine have brought this basic and historic assumption into question.

Date posted: 2014-02-23

The Dangers of Pornography Use - Imposing Morality or Scientific Truth?

Pornography use obstructs one's ability to relate with others, to form and sustain personal and interpersonal commitments, and to find joy in the most fundamental aspect of human functioning in intimate, close - emotional or physical - bonds.

Date posted: 2014-01-11

No Family Member Left Alone for the Holidays

In this time of year when many are focused on the hustle and bustle of the holidays, rather than pondering the holy days from which they have been taken, consider spending increased time with family and friends, and consider also seeking out those who might be "the least of your brothers," those who come to mind not so quickly, not so easily or without welcome and warm feelings. It is especially they who need a touch, a contact, a reminder of their dignity, of their worth, and that they, too, are deserving of love.

Date posted: 2013-12-22

No Difference Thesis: A Household Built On Sand

Children at higher risk for failing school: The impact of traditional marriage versus gay/lesbian parents.

Date posted: 2013-12-22

Wired for Less Wire Part 2: Children's Development

In my last article, I argued that the human person has relationship needs that are fundamental and universal; as adults, in our friendships, marriages, and other family relationships, we have a significant need for face-to-face time and a real presence.

Date posted: 2013-11-03

Wired For Less Wire

Every time your phone, tablet or computer pings with a new text, tweet or email, it triggers a sense of expectation, and the reward centers in our brain are stimulated similar to what occurs with certain drugs. Eventually, a brain adapted to these "fixes" begins to rewire itself, diminishing the structures needed for concentration, empathy and impulse control, while growing structures receptive to rapid processing and instant gratification.

Date posted: 2013-10-20

Of Guns, Video Games, and Mental Illness: Oh That It Were That Simple

As information emerges about the Navy Yard gunman's excessive use of violent video games and likely mental illness, people naturally are seeking understanding in hopes of preventing such tragedies in the future.

Date posted: 2013-10-08

Struggling New Jersey Teens: Are They Now Really Better Off?

The concern being addressed by such legislation is that young people who are struggling with same-sex attraction will be forced by their parents to undergo therapy aimed at changing their sexual inclinations.Presumably, the belief is that these often-distressed youth are better off accepting their current perception and feelings, regardless of their long-term impact, rather than engaging in some perhaps-difficult self-examination which could lead to healing and more fulfilling options for their future. Sadly, the foundation on which the legislation rests is riddled with inaccuracies and assumptions, and lacks thorough discernment of this complex issue.

Date posted: 2013-09-19

Macklemore's "Same Love": When Feelings Are Not Enough

Persuasive analyses of how a "gay culture" is going to be beneficial to civilization overall, is lacking. Most of the discussion from this perspective attempts to cast the movement towards "gay marriage" as an advancement of civil rights on par with other civil rights. It ignores the heretofore obvious fact that men and women are different, and such differences have huge implications for relationships.

Date posted: 2013-09-08

Coping When The Politics of Life Issues Touch Your Family: Pray Silently, Love Openly

Reflecting on the Supreme Court's striking down of key portions of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and the subsequent exuberant response of gay activists, the author of a recent article on a Catholic website rightly concludes that many families whose members have struggled privately with same sex attraction may find themselves with loved ones who are now emboldened to act on those attractions.

Date posted: 2013-08-13

The Selfless And The Selfish: Who Is Really Happy?

A Roman Catholic priest in Virginia became aware of a couple who was considering aborting their child, suspected of having Down's Syndrome, if they could not find an adoptive home immediately because they were approaching the state's abortion prohibition deadline of 24 weeks after conception. The priest posted the adoption request on social media and his church was overwhelmed with hundreds of offers to adopt by families from states across the country and from countries around the world.

Date posted: 2013-08-01

Modesty: Who's Responsible?

Some recent events in the news have highlighted just how difficult it is to affirm modesty as a virtue worth instilling. In one particular instance, a public school principal took a stance for modesty, and may end up in court as a result.

Date posted: 2013-07-06

Gay Kids or Adult Agendas? The Scouts' Dilemma

Apparently a 103-year history can be abolished by a three-year trend, and the "wisdom" of teens trumps that of the majority and the elders of the community.

Date posted: 2013-06-22

Draconian Bush-Era Indecency Rules, or Common Sense Protection?

The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) recently proposed relaxing its indecency regulations.

Date posted: 2013-06-22

A Critique of the Critiques: Regnerus' Parenting Study and What is Really Best for Children

Last year, Sociologist Dr. Mark Regnerus published a large-sample study which demonstrated that children flourish optimally when raised in the traditional family structure of a biological mother and father.

Date posted: 2013-05-18

Transgenderism and Student Health: Part II

As discussed in my previous essay, the new Massachusetts' statutes will create increased distress and challenges for the gender-confused child and his or her family; the consequences, unfortunately, will not stop there.

Date posted: 2013-05-04

Transgenderism and Student Health: Part I

In this first of a two-part essay series, I will examine whether the regulations in fact help gender-questioning children to flourish. A forthcoming essay will address the impact of the regulations on others in the school and community.

Date posted: 2013-04-20

Just Charity

This essay will show how the dual concepts of giving and receiving are foundational for human growth and development. The latter notion is easy to understand: humans need to receive certain basics - food, clothing, shelter, medical care, proper rest, and appropriate social services - in order to flourish.

Date posted: 2013-03-26